The Gift of Rest: Navigating Caregiving Through the Holidays

By Ama Brew, Founder of The Parent Forge

My journey into caregiving began during a routine four-month ultrasound appointment. I was expecting twins, but instead of the joyful checkup I had envisioned, I was informed that my babies were in critical condition and might not survive. They were born prematurely, required surgery and experienced numerous developmental delays. There were feeding tubes, specialist visits, therapy sessions and long nights filled with worry. Every milestone felt like climbing a mountain.

If you are a caregiver, you might be shouldering an invisible burden that few recognize. Perhaps you feel scattered, emotionally drained or perpetually on edge. These are not character flaws but indicators of chronic caregiver stress, a genuine crisis that thousands of caregivers endure in silence. As a parent caregiver, I have experienced this firsthand. As a mental health coach, I have supported many caregivers. As a researcher, I have studied this. Parenting a child with a disability can be complex and demanding, often resulting in additional financial, physical, psychological and social stress (Cheng & Lai, 2023; Heiman, 2021). Caring for a child with a chronic illness or disability is emotionally, socially and financially taxing, leading to higher levels of burnout (Mroskova et al., 2020).

As caregivers, we are often on call 24/7, navigating complex medical and educational systems, engaging in endless advocacy and shouldering emotional labor, all with little time to rest or recover. It can feel like being on a hamster wheel, spinning multiple plates while holding your breath. When you don’t pause to exhale, burnout becomes inevitable.

For many caregivers, the holidays can magnify that sense of exhaustion. While others are decorating and planning family gatherings, we are often navigating medical appointments, meltdowns or systems that do not pause just because it’s the holidays.

That is why, this holiday season, I invite every caregiver to give themselves the gift of rest.  

Here are a few reminders to hold close this year:

• Embrace self-compassion and prioritize presence over perfection. Holidays do not need to be flawless to hold meaning. By letting go of perfection and embracing presence, we create space for peace amidst chaos.
• Acknowledge your emotions. It is normal for the holidays to stir up feelings of grief, guilt or fatigue. Experiencing these emotions does not signify weakness or ingratitude; it simply means that you are human.
• Set Healthy Boundaries. Before saying yes, ask yourself: How much is too much? Protect your energy as you would your loved ones.
• Take mindful pauses. Even 60 seconds of breathing and checking in with yourself can restore balance.
• Embrace Radical Acceptance. Your way of celebrating might not conform to cultural expectations and that is okay. While cultural traditions offer a framework for celebrations, it is crucial to acknowledge that these expectations may not align with everyone's reality. Embracing your unique approach to festivities can lead to more authentic and fulfilling experiences.
• Ask for help and accept help. Seeking support is not a sign of weakness but a demonstration of self-awareness and strength.

Caregiving is sacred work, yet it is also demanding. This year, let us embrace the true essence of the holidays: slowing down, forging deep connections and acknowledging that we too are worthy of care.  

The most precious gift we can give ourselves is the permission to rest.

References

Cheng, A. W.Y., & Lai, C. Y.Y. (2023). Parental Stress in Families of Children with Special Educational Needs: A Systematic Review. Frontiers in Psychiatry. doi:10.3389/fpsyt.2023.1198302

Heiman, T. (2021). Parents’ Voice: Parents’ Emotional and Practical Coping with a Child with Special Needs. Psychology, 12(05), 675–691. https://doi.org/10.4236/psych.2021.125042

Mroskova, S., Rel'ovska, M., & Schlosserova, A. (2020). Burnout In Parents Of Sick Children And Its Risk Factors - A Literature Review. Central European Journal of Nursing and Midwifery, 11(4), 196-206.

Author Bio:

Ama Brew is the Founder of The Parent Forge, empowering parents and caregivers of children with disabilities through transformative mental health coaching, self-efficacy training, and psycho-education. Her mission is to create a world where caregivers feel capable, confident, and resilient. Ensuring that every child, regardless of ability, has the opportunity to thrive. Learn more at www.theparentforge.com.